One of the possible contributors to the development of borderline personality disorder (BPD) is traumatic events experienced in childhood. Looking at the potential causes of childhood trauma can assist in self-discovery for the adult BP, and help parents address possible causal factors for their own children.
One potential source of childhood trauma that is often overlooked is child-on-child physical violence. The source of violence can be someone at school, in the neighborhood, or even a brother or sister. Despite common thought, child-on-child physical violence can profoundly affect the victim and can have long-lasting effects.
Research has found that children who experience physical abuse from other children often have the same degree of trauma response as adults victimized by other adults.
Often, when violence experienced by a child is looked at objectively, the actions would be considered assault if the perpetrator were not another child. But because it is another child, the victimization can be dismissed as “no big deal,” instead of recognized as the violent act that it is. It may even be seen seen as a necessary occurrence to “toughen up” a child, or to teach a boy to “be a man.”
Researchers found that preschoolers were most likely to have weapons used or objects thrown at them, and they have the highest rates of injury. Siblings are also regular and repeated perpetrators of violence against children, so the violence is often chalked up to “sibling rivalry.” But instead of harmless sibling rivalry, one sibling may be living in fear of violent and random attacks by someone with whom he or she is expected to have a close, caring relationship. Often children live in close proximity and have regular, encouraged interaction with children who abuse them.
What Intervention Should Occur
Adults can validate the child’s fear, help the child feel safe, and help the child create a realistic plan of action to address future issues. Taking the child's feelings seriously can be an important step in reducing the level of trauma. When adults, those looked to for protection and comfort, fail to validate the danger and fear, the fear increases as does the likelihood of a trauma response.
This does not mean that everything in a child's life needs to be addressed with a strong response, but the circumstances of violent interactions involving children should be looked at through the child’s perspective, feelings should be validated, and the child empowered.
Sources
- Finkelhor D, et al. Kid’s Stuff: The Nature and Impact of Peer and Sibling Violence on Younger and Older Children, Child Abuse and Neglect December 2006: vol 30, no 12, p 1401-21
- Harvard Mental Health Letter, April 2007
