The Internet Can Improve Life with BPD
Finding Information
In the past, if you wanted information on BPD, you would have to either go to a professional or buy a book. Going to a professional is not easy, and many people do not have the resources to be able to afford professional help. While books are great (for example, see these recommended books on BPD), the information available in books is limited. The Internet, though, addresses all of these issues.
Getting Support
The Internet is a great place to find support. Many people with BPD feel that they are the only person in the world struggling with their experiences. Get online, however, and you get a better sense of just how common BPD is. There are numerous websites devoted to support for people with BPD and their loved ones. Online forums are a great way to join the discussion, share your struggles and give and get support. The BPD forum on this site is a great place to meet other people struggling with BPD.
Finding Help
When you're ready to seek help from a professional, the Internet is also a great place to find the help you need. Many online resources are available to help you find a therapist or other mental health professional.
Sharing Personal Stories
Many people with BPD are chronically lonely; they describe feeling as though no one can possibly understand their inner world. The Internet opens up new options for sharing personal accounts of struggles with BPD.
The Internet Can Make Life with BPD Harder
Unfortunately, it is not all good news, though. While the Internet can be a great help, it can also make life with BPD even harder. Here are some ways that the Internet can really get people with BPD (and their loved ones) into trouble:
Interpersonal Issues and the Internet
Some of the interpersonal symptoms of BPD can be worsened by the Internet. For example, many people with BPD have abandonment sensitivity, believing they are being abandoned (even when they aren't) and can engage in desperate measures to avoid real or perceived abandonment.
How does this play out on the Internet? Using the Internet to communicate can be very interesting — you can't see the other person, you can't read their nonverbal cues and you don't know when they have received your half of the communication. This ambiguity can be very difficult for people with BPD to deal with and may lead to perceived abandonment when there is none.
The Internet can also facilitate some of the desperate behaviors people with BPD may engage in when they feel abandoned. The Internet allows new avenues of communication (e-mail, personal websites, instant messaging) — all of which can be used to contact people who have tried to limit or end a relationship. Someone with BPD may feel so desperate that they will use these forms of communication inappropriately.
Impulsivity and the Internet
The Internet is a place where, since there is no face-to-face contact with other people, interpersonal inhibitions can be lower. Online, there is not the same kind of instant human feedback that we get in the real world. We are much more likely to do and say things online that we would not do otherwise.
People with BPD already struggle with impulsive behavior, so the Internet can really set them up for trouble. Lowered inhibitions combined with a means of instantaneous communication can lead a person with BPD to say or "do" things online that could lead to trouble, for example, engaging in illegal online activities, having cybersex or downloading pornographic materials.
Triggering Content, Self-Harm and Suicidal Sites
Unfortunately, while there are many sites devoted to supporting people affected by BPD, there are also many sites that can supply triggering content. Many sites with triggering content are well-intentioned; they are meant to help people overcome behaviors, such as deliberate self-harm. The content of these sites, though, may actually increase self-harm. Not to mention that there are other sites that actually promote self-harm or suicide.
Mistaking the Internet for Professional Help
While the Internet makes it much easier to get information about BPD, it can take away the incentive for seeking professional help. Educating yourself about BPD is great, but it is no substitute for seeing a mental health professional. Unfortunately, some people use the Internet as a substitute for professional help when it is probably better to use the information you've gathered in conjunction with a therapist.
Unreliable Information
Finally, while the vast amount of information available is an advantage of the Internet, it is also a disadvantage. As there are many reputable sources of information, there are also plenty of sites with unreliable information, and it can be difficult to tell the difference between the two.
What should you be on the lookout for? The quality of the site can sometimes be judged by the credentials of the person or people creating the content. Is the writer an expert in BPD? Do they have training in treating BPD or other experiences that make them a legitimate source of information? Is the site affiliated with an institution of higher learning or not-for-profit organization? Does the information posted on the site undergo any kind of scientific or medical review? Sometimes exploring the origins of the site can help you distinguish the reliable from the questionable.
Sources:
Adler PA, Adler P. "The Cyber Worlds of Self-Injurers: Deviant Communities, Relationships, and Selves." Symbolic Interaction, 31:33-56, 2008.
Griffiths M. "Sex on the Internet: Observations and Implications for Internet Sex Addiction." Journal of Sex Research, 38:333-342, 2001.
Suler J. "The Online Disinhibition Effect." CyberPsychology & Behavior, 7:321-326, 2004.
