Then, in 1998, the first edition of Stop Walking on Eggshells by Paul T. Mason and Randi Kreger, was published. The book was the first of its kind to address the concerns of BPD family members and friends.
Now, the second edition of Stop Walking on Eggshells is available (New Harbinger, 2010), and the book continues to be an absolute essential for family members, spouses, and friends of people with BPD.
The material for the book was collected from a few different sources, including expert interviews and the experiences shared by members of the Welcome to Oz listserve, an online community founded by co-author Randi Kreger. Unfortunately, the book draws little from published peer-reviewed research on BPD families. However, this is in part due to the lack of research available.
The book has a number of notable strengths. First, it covers a broad range of issues that loved ones face, and acknowledges that different types of relationships are affected differently by BPD. In addition, the book is quite sensitive to individuals with BPD, and goes to great lengths to be clear that people with BPD are not intentionally manipulative or hurtful, while also addressing the many challenges that BPD family members face.
Stop Walking on Eggshells also provides lots of real life examples of the issues discussed in the book, which makes it easy to read and digest. The sections that cover limit setting and boundaries are particularly detailed and helpful.
There are a few drawbacks that are worth noting, however. First, because the book addresses BPD relationships with such breadth, many of the topics cannot be covered in great depth, and end up feeling a bit superficial. Also, the format of the newest edition has more bulleted lists and side notes, which can be distracting and make the overall flow feel choppy.
Finally, while the medication information has been updated as well as the resources appendices, this second edition is not so different from the first to warrant buying it if you already have the first edition.
Despite these mainly minor drawbacks, Stop Walking on Eggshells is an absolutely essential read if you have a loved one with BPD. This book is sure to be one that you consult regularly as you negotiate the challenges of caring about someone with BPD.
