Yes
- I have lied often to make up reasons that others will understand for why I feel/act the way I do.
- —Guest ana
Telling lies..
- No - but here's an interesting take - someone famous once said: NEVER TELL THE TRUTH TO SOMEONE WHO DOESN"T DESERVE IT! Does that not make truth relative and not absolute? It certainly would absolve the liar from a lot of situations by putting him/her on the "moral" high ground. I can see why someone would lie though - lack of self esteem, fear of rejection. If these are not major concerns - there is no reason to lie. A common characteristic of Borderlines is to tell more than is necessary about themselves - too much disclosure, so I disagree with the theory that they are prone to lie more.
- —Guest Bonitaj
Yes, yes
- I lie sometimes because the truth is not believable, or I'm afraid of getting me or someone else in trouble, or mad at me. If I'm doing okay, I know I'll get less attention, so I'll make some new crisis up so I can keep people around me.
- —curioser
lying and BPD
- I have been diagnosed with BPD, but as far as lying goes, the symptom of seeing things as black or white dominates, and I simply CANNOT lie as it is morally wrong. It took me years to even allow myself to swear. I would acknowledge though, that for those who may not have the same moral up-bringing that I had, would find lying greatly to their advantage in manipulating people, another symptom or characteristic of the disorder. I have merely tried to manipulate without the use of lies. At this time, fortunately, the BPD is controlled and my behaviours have become much less destructive in my life and relationships.
- —nlcouch
Do You Tell Lies?
- I have only recently realized that I tell lies. I don't mean to. My housemate says that I am very manipulative and I tell lies. It really made me think, I don't mean to hurt anyone, I sometimes feel that I need to lie to get the help that I need. I think there may be a connection between lying and BPD symptoms. A psychiatrist in hospital told my housemates that I am very manipulative and it really upset me because I don't want to be like that but I feel like I can't help it. I feel terrible. I'm really hoping that it is a part of BPD somehow, otherwise that would make me a bad person? :(
- —Guest Cara
No, there is no link between BPD lying
- As a person who diagnosed with BPD for 1 year now, I think there is no link between borderline personality disorder and lying. I don't like to lie to people because this will lead me to feel very bad. If I am forced to lie, I will lie not to save myself but to save others from punishment or bad consequences. I think we have to avoid using BPD as an excuse for our lying.
- —Guest Oscar
Do You Tell Lies?
- I do when I feel like I'm being put on the spot. I also question my actions and am afraid that if I say what I had done was the wrong way or will be misconstrued. I doubt my abilities to make the right decisions so end up telling whomever what I think they want to hear. Then if it comes out it looks like I was trying to cover something up making the situation worse. When I try to explain my intentions and they don't match my actions I become un-credible.
- —certifiablynuts
BPD - Do I lie?
- In all seriousness, I don't lie unless it is going to spare someone's feelings, and even then, sometimes I don't lie. I am a true believer in the adage "Honesty is the best policy." I have many BPD characteristics, especially fear of abandonment and unstable relationships, in general; not only romantic ones. However, lying is not one trait I have or would care to have. It only gets you into more trouble.
- —carrielynnc
Is not a half truth, a whole lie?
- I have been married for 23 yrs. to a very difficult person. He is charming to a fault, but rile him up and he explodes in many ways. We have had a very difficult marriage and have been separated at least twice. I have a jealousy problem or so we think, currently undergoing treatment. While separated before, my hubby had many relationships before we got back together. He apologized once, said that it wouldn't happen again, but I never got over it due to extenuating circumstances. Never understood why I felt the need to soul search the reasons for it, but that it was my fault for pushing him into them. Was continually telling me not to go back to the past yet the last time we separated, was exactly where he went. He thinks the problems are all mine. I will stick by him no matter what, but how and when does one realize that they need help, or do they ever realize it? I have accepted so many questionable things that have been said or happened, but I love him and will stand by him.
- —Guest ilovecrafts1
lies
- I tell them all the time...better still not respond at all. Was diagmosed. Now the wife uses it as a weapon. So no truth is better for my survival
- —Guest chriszen
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